A flow of thoughts .
Sometimes I wonder how life would be if we achieved everything we wanted to achieve and our plans went according to the layouts but life is such a big surprise.I am very well aware of the fact that nothing in life is easy and one always has complaints from life but here I am sitting in the “padmasan” posture contemplating everything that could happen to me but didn’t .
I was supposed to start masters; get into a good college and would be working my ass off( by now) but on the contrary none of my plans worked, partly because of my own cloudy head and the other reasons.
Nothing started and I still remain jobless. I never wanted to be this person and I am not this person
But there are some good things that came along and today I will pen them all down ..
You see … I know most of you will quit from here, after the above stated but let me tell you there is a lot I can speak about depression and there’s a bitter truth attached to this, which is that depression never goes away. It remains with you since the moment the seed of it gets instilled in your system, all you can do is keep an eye on it like a sentinel. You can work hard towards your happiness and wash those gray areas dry but
As to what I learnt.
1. Humility: I learnt that humility is something one can never get enough of. Now that I remember it I understand as to how foolish I was: judging people, their choices, their relationships but one foot into my own sheepishly daunting life. I realized everyone has/had a story of their own and that even if it doesn’t matter. There are reasons as to why things are the way they are.
2. To not be Judgmental : this comes as the only observation that the more we judge the more negativity we attract .I realized or I am still am( I am a judgmental prick; what can I do now) so the more we embrace things and hug them out. The better we are and the more peaceful it is.
This realzation helped a lot; especially with interpersonal relationships.
3. To initiate : To start taking initiatives because being scared of something and being lazy has always killed the aftermath. If something needs to be done and you are aware of it “just do it”. I took an initiative to be healthy, to go back to the people with whom I scarred my relationships: it made my connections stronger and my life much better. I discovered that mathematics ain’t that bad… so please initiate. Atleast for the aftermath.
4. Health is wealth : After my GC warned me about weighing 76 kilos on the Weighing Scale. I took an initiative to put my health to check. As a result even if I ain’t the healthiest person on planet today; I now know, how much being healthy means and I am working with every inch I can to maintain my health.
5. To Embrace your people: I learnt the most important lesson, that it’s okay to be lonely and to feel lonely but at the same time its equally important to embrace your people .. It had been and it’ll always be mentally and physically challenging but it’s because of your “folk” you are what you are. So figure out your important people and it’s totally cool for them to know that you love them and inspite of all your cracks, it’s their glue that keeps you intact (inside out)
P.S: Your love is the reason I am writing this down today . You know who you all are.
* Especially if you are Narcissistic 😉 you are everything I am speaking of *
Thankyou for the read.
Wishing you all a very positive New year ahead .